15.3.07

13 SYMPTOMS OF A RETIRED MAN

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1. he grumbles about the way you peel the potatoes and that there is too much waste. When you ask him to show you how he does it, he cuts himself in his finger and the kitchen is full of blood.
2. he checks (when you have done it) that the bed is made correctly, the towles are folded and put in the closet but when he has to do it for a week, he doesn't care anymore and can suddenly sleep in an unmade bed and live with unfolded towles in the closets.
3. he insists to check the filter of the vacuum cleaner and doesn't find out how, turns the thing around and around and drops finally the dirty filter on the floor. Dust everywhere. He thinks about buying a second vaccuum cleaner, to vacuum the dust of the first one.
4. he wonders why the mailbox has to be emptied everyday. He hadn't realized that there was a mailbox, because the mail always lay on the table.
5. he wonders why the garbadge hadn't been picked up and the bottles and cartons not been taken.He calls angrily the city and complains loudly and is all astonished to hear that there are certain garbadge dates to be respected. He does a sophisticated table with the dates in his computer, and mixes up the garbadge which he put out on the wrong dates.
6. he is quite asthonished that he has to put dirty socks, shirts, shorts etc. in the laundry basket to be washed, instead of distributing them on the floor as for the past 35 years.
7. he complains that the washing machine turns such a long time and is consuming electricity, but didn't dare to suggest to wash it all by hand.
8. he proposes to wash up the dirty dishes to safe water and electricity instead of using the dishwasher, but gives it up after one day.
9. he suddenly realizes that somebody has to do the grocery shopping otherwise there is no food on the table. During the whole week he works at this list and then forgets half of the shoppings.
10. he wonders that breakfast doesn't come alone on the table and that it has to be prepared and therefore somebody has to get up. He prepares a "to make breakfast" date list in his computer and forgot to switch on the coffee machine.
11. he wonders how many pans and pots are used for cooking, especially when he has to wash them up and pretends that he can do it with only one pot. Result a completely messed up kitchen which took 2h to clean.
12. he is really surprised that windows have to be cleaned to be able to look through
13. he should admit (if he is honnest) that household "work" is work too !
(These are facts I collected from my friends.) Of course I have nothing to complain about.























23 comments:

christine said...

Ahh, the joys of married life. Is this what I have to look forward too? We're only on year 5.

My list is up too. I'm all about chickens this week.

Shoshana said...

Now this is funny. I like the retired part. It means vacation!

Pamela said...

I'm glad my hubby is not like that.
I think firefighters learn how to clean up. He even cleans up after me.

mar said...

What a funny list, and so true from what I have heard. Mr Mar has suggested early retirement and I am absolutely against it, office work should keep him busy for me to keep my sanity.
Happy TT!

Darla said...

LOL! These are wonderful! And, sadly, true. My mother-in-law complained about almost every one of them.

Fortunately, my husband spent two years as a househusband when he was in grad school, and our two older kids were small, and so far (15 years later--hard to believe!), the lesson has stuck with him.

Robin said...

Oh dear. Sounds like someone needs a project. Quick!

Happy TT.

Irish Church Lady :) said...

LOL I loved that list! I can just imagine him doing and suggesting these things! It must be because I have people like that in my family!

MC Milker said...

MY DH does these things already and he's only in his 30s!

Jeanette said...

Hi Gattina.
Pookie looks so comfy with her diary, Retirement is fun for the man but when does the lady ever retire. I would like to no.

Melli said...

My husband wants me to get a "real job" ... he doesn't know that I am just waiting until HE retires to DO that! I do NOT want to be around the house once he IS being around the house!!! LOL!

Janene said...

I actually lucked out a bit in this department...my husband is a neat freak and cleans the kitchen every night...well, almost every night. He's a freak about running the vaccum, too.

It is annoying how he asks me what I did during the day, though. My kids keep me awfully busy...sometimes there's no time for housework. :)

Angela Giles Klocke said...

Tee hee - this was too cute!

Uisce said...

MMMMmmmm, potatoes. I like potatoes. we have this special dish we make that requires potato peeling and slicing. I'm every so happy to do that because we get to have the special dish. happy TT, mine's up!

the night owl said...

Good Morning!! I have been lucky, my husband has helped me with housework
forever! I have retired and he still
works two days a week, since his retirement.I got a GOOD MAN.
Baba

Mrs Lifecruiser said...

Oh, you're very wise Gattina to put on the lifejacket already. The captain could/should be drunk and the crew is just looking handsome and all the cruisers are totally nuts ;-)

Maybe we should be named to Titanic instead? *lol*

Mrs Lifecruiser said...

Oh, forgot to comment on the retirement suprises: he he, finally he gets it....

Clare said...

That's a great picture of Pookie, Gattina.

Hope all is well with you.

Joy Renee said...

LOL he needs a hobby. maybe introduce him to blogging.

my TT #24 is continued from last week:

http://joystory.blogspot.com/2007/03/thursday-thirteen-24.html

13 more research projects impacted by the impending library closure.

Also I posted an explanation of the closure last weekend. Sort of.

Three weeks plus one day. Somebody stop the clock pleeease...

Ctina said...

Fun list! It sounds a little like my Dad!

Caylynn said...

LOL! :D Very funny Gattina! :) I'm glad my husband is an army officer. Military life teaches them how to clean, cook and look after themselves!

Have a good day! :)

Tink said...

I think I'm very lucky with my hubby, who always prepares the meals and helps in the household whenever he can. Funny list!
Thanks for visiting my handbag TT!

Sophisticated Writer said...

This is so true. I hear that all older men are all like that when they retire. This is so funny :-) I really like your posts. Thanks for dropping by.

Salix Tree said...

I laughed so hard at the first one, he cuts his finger and the kitchen is full of blood. How funny!!
This list has too many truths! *giggles*